I don't want my parents to babysit my kids anymore because they give them sweets and screen time all day.
My parents look after my two kids (5 and 7) on Saturdays. Every time I pick them up, they're wired: chocolate, fizzy drinks, and tablets all day. Bedtime on Saturdays is a disaster.
I asked nicely, twice. My mother says 'grandparents are supposed to spoil them' and 'you grew up fine.'
So I've arranged a Saturday activity class for the kids instead. My mother is heartbroken and my dad says I'm keeping the grandchildren from them. I said they can visit any time, just not as babysitters.
Am I being too strict?
You didn't ban them, you changed the arrangement. Your kids, your rules.
Maybe meet halfway: one treat and one hour of tablet. Grandparents ARE allowed a little spoiling.
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🔬 The analysis
Leaning towards the author being right, but not by a landslide (64% say right, 23% say wrong).
See the numbers and the psychology
Typical range: about 4 to 9. The average is accurate to about ±0.3 (95% confidence). This is a community poll, not a scientific sample, because people choose to take part.
🧠 Psychology lens
A parent wants to change childcare because grandparents ignore agreed limits on sweets and screens.
May feel her parenting is being overridden.
Grandparents may feel their closeness is being cut and that spoiling is part of their role.
Psychology ideas that may apply
Cultures differ in how much weight they give to family duty versus personal choice.
Here: Ideas about what grandparents are "allowed" to do differ between families and cultures.
Losing something usually hurts more than gaining the same thing feels good.
Here: Grandparents may feel the loss of their role more than the loss of the rule.
💡 Agreeing one or two rules that matter most, and leaving room for small treats, often protects both the routine and the relationship.
Written by AI from one person's account, using well-known psychology ideas for reflection. It is not a diagnosis or advice, and it can be wrong.
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